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depressed.
i think i lost...
my friends.
my sense of humour.
my mind
my faith.
my focus.
and most importantly.. God.
and i thought mum was right. In fact, she's damn right. 2 years is short, isn't it? its either i make it to the university or i don't. If i don't, i will be left with no choice but to study in the poly. I would have wasted 2 years in JC and also of cos wasted lots of money.
and i realised... money. Its a something i've taken for granted for the past 1 year? i spent almost every cent in my bank within a year (strictly speaking it's around 7months) , that's like 2.5k. my family's not rich at all, though my sister and brother might be working in the government sector. my mum have to wake up at 3a.m. to go and work. And now, how many of you actually know this? I'm saying these because i'm not ashamed of my mother, in fact i'm very proud of her.
i don't know how long more can i take it. it's like i've not been talking nor interacting much in class. i don't know what to say and who to talk to. Suddenly, they feel so foreign to me and i can't relate to any of them. i don't want to be labelled as a loner nor an outcast because deep down in my heart i know i'm not and for those who REALLY know me well, u know i'm not, don't u? Or do u?
i really need a listening ear. i know God is always there.. But it seems that i can't really feel Him? i feel so sad because i don't want to lose the friendship i have with Him.
Jesus, You are my best friend.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
linzi
050689
jjc
touch rugby
